The long reception like table will be filled with Swiss Cake Rolls, banana peppers and pork rinds with Pepsi and Rock Star galore at your funeral! Throughout the room there will be displays of all your gadgets and creations for people to see. People will share their favorite stories and memories – there will be tears mixed with lots of laughter. This was my dream the night after attending a good friend’s funeral. He was only 41. I dreamt about how I would want to celebrate my husband’s life.
This weekend unfolded an opportunity for my husband and I to have some conversations we have long avoided. You see, we have never really discussed (seriously) our wishes when we die, our expectations if we are not able to make medical decisions for ourselves, or what type of celebration/funeral we would like. Although these are things we do not like to talk about we realized that we needed to have these conversations. If we don’t have these conversations now it is left up to the person who is left in the most difficult time to have to make these decisions.
Along with the difficult conversations, we took the time to discuss our hopes and dreams for our future. We realized that the old saying is true, “life is short”. We have no idea when our earthly life will end. As many people we wake up each day and do what we need to do to get through the day. We talked about how we can slow down and consciously enjoy and be present in each day. While this is not our nature, we are both making an effort to do things differently before our time ends.
I am happy to have known our friend. He truly did impact our lives while we had time with him. I am happy to say he is also impacting our lives after his earthly life has ended. I encourage you all to find ways to be present today, to enjoy the people in your lives, make your mark today and have the difficult conversations!
-by Kendra M. Silver, M.S., L.P.C.